[verse]
Roll up, roll up, step right in!
We shrunk it down, it’s safe again!
No meltdowns, no waste, no fear
Just don’t ask where it disappears!

[verse]
Fits on a truck, parks by your school!
Risk? Nah, that’s the golden rule!
A lawsuit here, a bailout there,
But hey don’t breathe the Utah air!

[chorus upbeat, gang vocals]
Hype train, hype train, full speed ahead!
"Choo-choo, baby!" that’s what they said!
More reactors, more mistakes,
 When it derails, guess who pays?!

[verse]
Factory-built, so nice and neat!
Stack ‘em up on any street!
A soda can could last for years—
But where it vents? That’s unclear!

[bridge horn break, building tension]
They called it "clean," they called it "cheap"
'Til the budget’s in too deep!
Cost per watt? Through the roof!
"We swear it works, but where’s the proof?"

[chorus reprise, bigger horns, chaotic energy]
Hype train, hype train, watch it roll!
On your street, out of control!
They want it fast, they want it now,
Same old scam in a different town!

[breakdown minimalist, single guitar skank]
"Accidents don’t happen with great frequency..."
"SMRs produce less waste!"
"Spent fuel? Just store it on-site!"
"Trust us... this time we got it right!"

[final chorus chaotic, full gang vocals]
 Hype train, hype train, can’t slow down!
 Crashing straight into your town!
No meltdown, no waste NO DOUBT?!
Wait where’s the money now?

[outro sudden stop, deadpan spoken]
“Well... that didn’t work.”